Aldi Is Selling A Patio Heater That’s Also A Bluetooth Speaker And Light Show

Alfie PowellAlfie Powell in News, UK
Published 22.05.19
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Aldi really are pulling out all the stops when it comes to their garden furniture department.

Granted, most of their products are exclusively for warming you up, such as their wood burner, their wood burner and who could forget the other wood burner?

But this time you don’t need to burn wood to stay warm in the garden with one of Aldi’s products, since their newest outdoor heater plugs right into the mains.

Handy.

aldi-patio-heater

It also comes decks out with a Bluetooth speaker and an LED light display that changes colour depending on what mood you’re after, given that it’s controlled by a remote. Very useful for parties.

The heater comes out tomorrow (23rd of May) and will set you back a cool £99. Not a bad price for something you’ll use this summer but will forget you own next year. Not a bad price at all.

Annoyingly though, the patio heater is only available on Aldi’s website and the stock is limited, so if you want one, you better get on that site posthaste.

Not that gardens have roofs, but if you’re wondering whether it would fit on your patio, the heater comes in at 135cm tall. To put that into context, it’s two centimetres taller than actor Peter Dinklage. I’m going out on a limb here and saying that it definitely fits in your garden.

aldi-patio-heater-99

If you’re more into the old fashioned ways, then their wood burners may be more your speed…

Not to be rude but, for Aldi, it actually looks surprisingly good, decked out with some kind of stone-effect, diamond-cut exterior with the grill slotting in neatly on top.

The only bad thing about the fire pit is its name, and that’s “Garden Fire Pit Faux Stone Exterior”. Doesn’t really roll off the tongue but let’s be honest, once you buy it, when would you ever have any cause to say it’s name. It’s hardly going to run away in the park.

aldi-fire-pit-barbecue

Hilariously, Aldi’s description perfectly sums up the expectations for a British summer, saying:

This Fire Pit with faux stone surround will add sophistication to any outside space. Keep warm on chilly summer evenings and impress friends by converting the Outside Fire Pit into a handy cooking grill.”

In what other country could you say “chilly summer evenings” and not have anyone double take at that. Cold summers? Yep. Next.

aldi-barbecue-fire-pit

£49.99 for that. Pretty good, but you have to order it online and I imagine they’ll sell out pretty sharpish. Do hurry.

If that’s not your bag, then you can go for Aldi’s other fire-related thing, in the shape of this £59.99 outdoor wood burner.

aldi-wood-log-burner

It looks pretty cool and it’s made out of my favourite kind of steel; “durable steel”.

There’s not much else to say about this one. It doesn’t double up as a barbecue or anything. I’m sure you could throw a chicken in there if you felt absolutely compelled to, but you probably shouldn’t. Certainly not a live one. That would be awful.

Once again, Aldi set the bar low for the upcoming Summer’s weather, saying:

Make the most of your garden day and night with this Outdoor Log Burner,” the online description says

Wave goodbye to chilly evenings outside and hello to a cosy place by the fire.

Durable and stylish, the black and bronze finished Outdoor Wood Burner has been made with a robust steel frame and is latticed in a steel mesh to help guard against any wayward flames.”

Hope for the best, prepare for the worst, I suppose.

Images via Aldi, Getty

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