I imagine something like “Alright fine. I’m 13. I presume Jeremy Clarkson’s relationship with the BBC is still watertight? Elon Musk sure went quiet after creating PayPal, didn’t he?”
Anyway, that’s what I’m currently writing about, as Aldi have released their entry for this year’s Christmas advert palava.
Previously, we were shown a glimpse of the Aldi advert, with a nefarious group known as the Leafy Blinders – Brummie Sprouts – coming for Kevin’s crown, but now we get the whole thing. They are led by Russel Sprout – who isn’t too happy about the humble carrot’s plans to throw a massive Christmas show.
Honestly I’m disappointed…
Firstly, why would the head sprout throw something at a carrot already tied to a grater? He could have quite easily grated him. Secondly, why would he throw a sentient being at him? Why’s he getting a tomato involved as collateral damage? Thirdly, why not get someone with better aim to throw the tomato? He missed badly.
After that, the sprouts are easily dispensed with, which is a huge anticlimax, and then Kevin breaks into a very non-Christmassy Robbie Williams song.
Sean McGinty, Director of Marketing for Aldi UK, was ecstatic to see the return of Kevin, saying:
“We’re all thrilled to see Kevin back on our screens again, getting up to his usual tricks. Kevin’s popularity grows every year and he’s becoming something of a national treasure!
“Kevin’s magical Big Top is the perfect environment to showcase the amazing quality of the Aldi Christmas range of food and drink this year.“
If for some reason you want to watch Kevin on TV, you can catch him on 7th November at 5:30pm on ITV.
Now we all patiently await to see what John Lewis are going for, and what great song they’ve had weirdly covered.
Images via Aldi
Alfie Powell joined as an apprentice and was probably hired because he was likely the only person who applied. He's been blagging his way through writing articles for four years now and he's definitely showing signs of slowing down. When not writing for The Hook, Alfie finds time to indulge in his favourite hobbies, such as drinking and sitting down. You can contact Alfie at [email protected]Follow