Just imagine playing this with your p**sed Nan on Christmas Day.
My nan can be Team Llama, though. As if I’m passing an opportunity to be Team Unicorn; my gay card entitles me to it. She can fight me if she wants.
Hasbro’s new Unicorns Vs. Llamas edition of Monopoly decides once and for all which of these brilliant beasts is the best. *I mean one is a magical, flying dream of a creature and the other a llama, but sure*
Forget the kids, most adults I know would lose their s**t unwrapping this on Christmas morning. Here’s the official game synopsis by Hasbro:
“Inspired by the lively rivalry between llamas and the mythical unicorn, the Monopoly Unicorns vs. Llamas game can be a fun game for animal lovers everywhere. This edition of the Monopoly board game is designed to be played in teams. Join Team Unicorn or Team Llama and move around the board to claim titles such as Most Colorful, Twinkliest Eyes, Most Charming, and Sweetest. The game ends when all titles have been claimed and the team with the most titles wins. The winners can say that their adorable beast is the best!”
Is this not the most outrageously camp and glorious version of Monopoly ever?! I mean players gallop around the f**king Monopoly board picking up TITLES like ‘Most Huggable’ and ‘Most Likely to Save the Day’, instead of the traditional properties.
Technically the game is for kids (suitable for ages 8+), but let’s face it, in the world we’re living in right now, I think us adults (or big kids) could use a little extra sparkle in our lives – especially at this time of year. And if my recent gallivants down the High Street are anything to go by, unicorns and llamas are still the coolest creatures of them all.
Here are a couple of adult reviews I stumbled across on the ‘gram.
Just don’t let it ruin your Christmas, okay?
Unfortunately, the game is only available from US Amazon ($19.99 plus shipping), which means us Brits can order the game, but it’s unlikely to come in time for Christmas. I know, I know.
But I wasn’t exactly NOT going to tell you about this gem, was I? American readers, buy this game and play it for all of us this Christmas. Do what you muse to bring those unicorns to victory for me.
I’m ordering one of these for each of my boys. It won’t come in time for Christmas, but call it a bright, shiny and sparkly cure for the drizzly January blues.
Images via Hasbro and Amazon
Having worked in children's media and publishing for almost a decade, Ben is thoroughly excited to now be able to swear in stories and features. He is such a big fan of Disney and Horror films that he started an LGBTQ+ podcast called 'Once Upon A Scream'. His mum listens. You can contact Ben at [email protected] Twitter: @PulsfordBen / Instagram: @thebenmidlerFollow