Not too long ago I wrote about a similar product in the shape of colourful lace shorts; you could see though them and they were another thing that I wouldn’t wear, but I sort of saw the artistic merit in them.
You know? They’re colourful, they look like Bilbo Baggins’s lace doily, they actually look like they took more than two minutes to design; everything you could ask for in a left-field pair of shorts.
These ones though – which are being sold in all manner of shops and Amazon – aren’t like that and I’m certain just exist so people can point and stare and offer publicity, like those kids who do dance routines in supermarkets.
Maverick Swim are the company responsible for the clothing which, honestly, looks like when you get a tattoo and you have to have it wrapped in clingfilm afterwards, and they’ve named their invisible shorts “Berlin Transparent Waterproof Beach Shorts”.
First things first, it’s probably worth pointing out that more than anything else, these shorts are actually swimming trunks.
Secondly, yes they’re just clear plastic with neon trims.
Now I understand that people don’t buy clothes for their rigidity, but these look very flimsy. I actually bought a pack of trainer socks the other day for around £10 that came in a bag that I’m sure it’s the same material.
They’re charging $27 for these trunks. That’s a lot of money for something that will probably tear after 3 wears.
At least they’re wipe-clean.
Mind you, if you buy the Berlin shorts with the Trinidad mini speedo, you can save $5…
If the lace shorts were more your speed, you can get some courtesy of Hologram City, and they’ll set you back $42 (£32), with matching shirts for the same price.
Like I say, absolutely horrible but they come in five colours, in the forms of pink, blue, purple, black and white. Swings and roundabouts.
They are almost completely see-through and I’m pretty much certain that you wouldn’t be allowed into any venue worth going to whilst wearing something like these shorts.
Sure, I think you’re supposed to wear underwear beneath them, but it’s not a great look, is it? Sometimes I don’t want the pressure of having to wear really nice pants every time I wear my airy shorts.
I don’t know. You do you.
Images via Hologram City, Maverick Swim, Getty, Myself
Alfie Powell joined as an apprentice and was probably hired because he was likely the only person who applied. He's been blagging his way through writing articles for four years now and he's definitely showing signs of slowing down. When not writing for The Hook, Alfie finds time to indulge in his favourite hobbies, such as drinking and sitting down. You can contact Alfie at [email protected]Follow