Corona beer is suffering. Oh boy is it suffering. Why is it suffering? Well, as the Coronavirus maintains its chokehold on global society, things with similar names are becoming collateral damage.
I say “things”, but really it’s just the beer Corona that sounds like Coronavirus, and the company that makes Corona, Anheuser-Busch InBev, has reported a loss of $170 million (or £132 million).
You know what you could do with that money? You could make Luke Evans’ Dracula Untold. Two and a half times! You shouldn’t, but you could, such is the loss of Corona beer.
That money is limited to China over January and February this year, mind, while total revenue is down $285m (£221m) – just over two Will Smith’s I, Robots – which I think we can all agree is lots of money.
The next Fast and Furious film is really going to have to pull out all the stops to make it so people buy Corona again.
If I may though, before we get into this properly, this global pandemic is taking its toll on most companies.
Even yesterday I got a message from Trading212 – all of my stocks are down except for some rhodium company (delicious rhodium!) – and they explained that everything looks like 1929 mixed with 2008 because of Coronavirus.
In fact, I think trading might have been blocked.
Anyway, Anheuser-Busch InBev, who also make Budweiser (boo), Stella Artois (boo), Leffe (nice) and Modelo (s’alright), say that this marks the large decline in quarterly profit for over ten years.
The Belgium-based group said:
“The impact of the Covid-19 virus outbreak on our business continues to evolve.
“The outbreak has led to a significant decline in demand in China in both on-premise and in-home channels.
“Additionally, demand during the Chinese New Year was lower than in previous years as it coincided with the beginning of this outbreak.”
The drop in custom extends to bars, clubs and restaurants too, with CEO Carlos Brito telling reporters:
“Our business is all about going to restaurants, to nightlife, going out with friends, it’s really about to go back to normal, we’re preparing for the surge when things return to normal.
“As we look to the future, we are determined to lead growth through consumer-centricity, operational excellence and innovation.
“Our performance in 2019 was below our expectations, and we are not satisfied with these results.“
I’m sure everything will work out for the plucky little beer company and once the Coronavirus outbreak becomes manageable, shares and revenue will begin to increase again.
Let’s hope – for the sake of the people and not for the sake of the beer company, necessarily – that all of this is promptly sorted out.
Images via Getty, Universal