Woman Puts Brother’s Car Up For Sale In Hilarious Facebook Advert

Olivia MulliganOlivia Mulligan in Funny, News
Published 03.10.19
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Scrolling through your social media, it’s not uncommon to see that something, somewhere, is being put up for sale.

Whether its someone desperately getting shot of an unwanted piece of furniture, or someone selling their old phone- social media has become a great way to advertise your unwanted belongings.

And recently, this has never been more true, after one woman chose to mix advertising with classical comedy wit.

Laura Jones, race mechanic and grid girl from Coventry, United Kingdom, was tasked with putting her brother’s car up for sale, as he went away for work.

Usually, you might just choose to go on the Facebook market section and stick it on with a picture and price tag, but 26-year-old Laura opted to have a bit more fun with this particular advertisement:

Now as you can see, the post has received a phenomenal response with 10k shares and over 8k comments, but it’s not because of the car.

In the post, Laura provides all of your need-to-know information about the vehicle, all the while making you chuckle.

What did she write in the advert?

Starting with a visual description of the vehicle, Jones writes:

‘So as my brother is away with work, he’s for some reason, asked ME to sell his car for him (god only knows why anyone would ever ask me to do such a thing!) so here it goes

This is a 59 plate (also known as 2009) Ford Fiesta – not a focus, not a clio and certainly not a flying carpet.

The car is grey – don’t ask me what shade of grey it is, all I know is it’s a special colour changing paint as it looks black when it’s dark… as does everything else around it – funny that.

It is a 1.6 tdci (a diesel) – it’s good on fuel – no this doesn’t mean you can throw a fiver in it, break down after 80 miles then ring me saying I lied about the fuel economy – use your noggin.

The car is a 3 door – 1 door on the left, 1 door on the right and a tailgate to the rear – you may use any of those doors to enter and exit the vehicle if you want to mix things up a bit.

It has 5 seats (if you’re after a 2 seater I can remove the back bench for you at a charge of £100 plus a cup of tea and a custard cream). I have absolutely no idea if it has isofix, however if it doesn’t I’m happy to ratchet strap your child in before you leave.

Comes with a stereo of some kind, probably good enough to blast Skepta out of whilst pulling into McDonald’s, to see what 16 year old you can pull on a Wednesday night, whilst straining your neck to see over the steering wheel due to your seat being practically horizontal… but you look cool AF so that’s all that matters here.

Full service history – all recorded in the service book – don’t try the whole “well you could have just got your mate to stamp it”… very true – price still remains the same.

Comes with log book and a key – don’t know if the key belongs to the car but I’ll throw it in anyway for good measure.

Now then – test drives. You are more than welcome to test drive the car IF you can prove to me you’re insured. By prove, I do not mean your mate McKenzie swearing on his dogs life that he’s got a licence, or telling me you’re insured on every car because your mate’s, uncle’s, goldfish’s, mum’s, nephew owns a garage. What I mean is, I need to see your insurance… end of.

The car is open to a full inspection – this can include seeing which awfully cheap lowering springs you could order off eBay for it. How big the boot is to fit your sub woofer in, which you’ll secure with a bungee and used red bull cans. How many 99p blue bulbs you can fit into the interior lighting and of course, how many storage compartments there are to keep your grinder and 10bag for your career in herbal dealing.

So, the car is up for sale for £2750 – that does not translate to any of the following –

. I offer payment plans
. I’ll take £500
. I’ll hold onto it for 3 months whilst you save up your dole money
. I’ll loan you the car with the promise you’ll pay me for it to then have it returned to me by the old bill after it was used for a day light robbery (not my 1st choice for a getaway car I must say)
. Allow you to take it for a 3 day test drive

You will get 4 alloy wheels attached to the car – “I’m interested in buying the wheels” absolutely no problemo Pablo! Buy the wheels and get a fiesta free, all for the nice sum of £2750

Going back to test drives – if you can’t show me proof of insurance, then I am more than happy to take you for a spin in the car. By spin, I mean take it around the block and demonstrate all gears work correctly, brakes work and throttle without any components falling off the car. If at any point whilst I’m driving, you decide to try and find chav FM on the radio, adjust my mirrors, press any buttons, or god forbid, attempt to speak to me, I will kindly leave you on the side of the road.

Last but not least, if you happen to be that absolute knobber who comes to view the car, realises I’m of the female kind and attempts to tell me how the car is broken in anyway shape or form, I promise to waste a minimum of 50 minutes of your time going along with your lies, purely for entertainment, shits and giggles, making you think you’re going to get the car for half the price, followed by mid conversation, shaking your hand and kindly telling you to p*ss off.

So yep… there you have it. Fiesta. Grey. Diesel. Goes brum. £2750′

I mean, exceptional stuff.

People are absolutely loving it:

Speaking to The Hook, Laura said:

“I’ve had quite a few different responses. Some genuine enquiries. A lot of people with no interest in the car followed by awful chat up lines and other people simply complimenting my advert write up!

Being honest, I HATE selling cars due to the amount of idiots so I felt if I wrote it as an idiot…it may wean some of them out!”

When asked what her brother thought of the clever ad, Laura said:

“He’s not really big into social media however when I sent him the link it was more of a ‘oh for god sake what’s she done?!’ response”.

A natural response really, although I’m sure he couldn’t help but chuckle along like the rest of us.

Who knew that advertising could be so entertaining, eh?

Images via Facebook

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