The 28-year-old Little Mix Star candidly speaks about being faced with the cruel comments on her new BBC Three documentary Jesy Nelson: Odd One Out.
Speaking about her obsession with looking through nasty social media posts about herself, she said that her lowest point was after a performance on The X Factor back in 2013.
Jesy felt as though she “couldn’t take it any longer”.
Following the suicide attempt, Jesy spoke to her bandmates, family and friends about what had happened, but added: “Once it was spoken about, it wasn’t ever spoken about again”.
The Guardian quoted her as saying: “It only got worse when I got Twitter. And that led to the Daily Mail, and reading the [below the line] comments – the worst you can read about yourself.
“It was like I purposely wanted to hurt myself.”
“I had a routine of waking up, going on Twitter, searching for the worst things I could about myself,” she said.
“I’d type in the search bar, ‘Jesy fat’, or ‘Jesy ugly’, and see what would come up. Sometimes I didn’t even need to do that, I’d just write ‘Jesy’ and then I’d see all the horrible things.
“Everyone told me to ignore it – but it was like an addiction.”
In a new BBC documentary Jesy adds: “I was sat in bed crying, thinking, ‘This is never going to go, I’m going to feel sad for the rest of my life, so what is the point in being here?’
“The only way I can describe the pain is like constantly being heartbroken. I remember going to the kitchen and I just took as many tablets as I could. Then my ex, who was with me at the time, he woke up and was like, ‘why are you crying?’ I kept saying, ‘I just want to die’.”
Nelson, 28, said she would starve herself before TV performances or video shoots, then later binge eat.
Her lowest point came after Little Mix returned to the X Factor in 2013 and Nelson’s appearance again drew criticism, and the singer attempted suicide.
“I felt that I physically couldn’t tolerate the pain any more,” she said.
The BBC documentary will be available on the iPlayer and will air on BBC One from 12 September.
Speaking about the bullying in more detail she added:
“I had about 101 Facebook messages in my inbox, and the first one that came up was from some random man, saying: ‘You are the ugliest thing I’ve seen in my life, you do not deserve to be in this girl band. You deserve to die’.”
Jesy continued: “The whole world had an opinion on me and they weren’t good ones. From the minute those comments started it became one of the worst times of my life.
“I wasn’t known as one of the singers from Little Mix. I was always known as ‘the fat, ugly one’. It literally consumed every part of me.”
And now boyfriend Chris Hughes has come out to support her.
Love Island star Chris has called his girlfriend of eight months a ‘role model’ after the interview. The 26-year-old wrote: ‘My girlfriend is the best motha f***ing role model on this planet.’
Fans filed in with messages of support for Jesy, with one Mixer writing: ‘she is incredible, and brave, and deserves the world.’
Others thanked Chris for supporting their girl, with one reply reading: ‘thank you for always loving her and supporting her and defending her.’
What a touching sentiment.