We’ve all faced this conundrum in our lives, haven’t we?
Either we drink the warm beer, or stay sober. It’s a tough choice, especially when you’re surrounded by forward-thinking friends who look practically orgasmic as they sip on they’re ice-cold beverages at pre drinks round Mikey’s.
I don’t know who Mikey is, but let’s stick with him for this analogy.
Of course, the only real choice is to grin and bear it and drink a warm beer or two, while you let the freezer work it’s magic on the rest of you six-pack (of beer – sadly, there’s no invention for that one yet).
Now, if you’re anything like me, you then then proceed to get gradually pissed on said warm alcohol – while endlessly asking yourself, “why me?” – forgetting all about the other beers chilling in the freezer. Those beers then eventually explode and suddenly, you’re pissed on warm beer, you’ve lost four drinks to freezer science and now you’re cleaning Mikey’s fridge out.
It’s the stuff of pre-drinking nightmares and too many of us have been there. Substitute beer for Sainsbury’s Prosecco and I’ve been there seven or eight times.
But, ‘Juno’ a revolutionary new microwave designed for cooling might be the answer to our pre-drinking prayers. The creators claim it can “rapidly chill wine, beer, coffee and more in under 1 minute”.
I don’t want to string you along, though; most miracle cures come at a cost and this magic microwave is costly – but let’s all keep dreaming together for a while.
‘Juno’ – which has been successfully crowd-sourced –was unveiled at CES 2020, a technology conference in Las Vegas, this week. The creators have been busy showing off how the device can cool a can of beer (and cans of soft drink – for any partakers in Dry January who have particularly deep pockets) in just a couple of minutes.
If you can hold out for five minutes, it can even chill a whole bottle of wine for you. Now you’re talking.
God, I love science.
The creators at Indiegogo say:
“Juno can do so much more than just chill wine. It can turn your freshly brewed coffee cold, transform your hot tea into iced tea, and cool your favourite beer or soda, right in the can.”
Akram Boukai, CEO and co-founder of Indiegogo, adds:
“Juno is the ultimate consumer demonstration of how our cooling technology can radically alter the way we manipulate temperatures.
“But the applications are endless and we’re so excited for the future partnerships and use-cases of Matrix thermoelectric cooling technology.”
The product is just a prototype at the moment, but the devices are set to go on sale this August and people are already bidding for their own magical microwave; which start at £228, btw. Yikes – ask me again in February.
But compare that price to the amount you’ve wasted on leaving beers to explode in a freezer. If you’re like me and you’ve been doing that with Prosecco bottles for years, then you know all too well that it adds up.
Images via Indiegogo and Getty
Having worked in children's media and publishing for almost a decade, Ben is thoroughly excited to now be able to swear in stories and features. He is such a big fan of Disney and Horror films that he started an LGBTQ+ podcast called 'Once Upon A Scream'. His mum listens. You can contact Ben at [email protected] Twitter: @PulsfordBen / Instagram: @thebenmidlerFollow