A Greggs steak bake makes the holy trifecta of perfection with those other two things, and if I wasn’t so self-destructive that I decided to cut beef out of my diet, I would be having one almost every day. These days, Stormzy can for absolutely free.
Now, I’m always slightly dubious when you hear of celebrities receiving black cards for Nando’s and the like; of all of the people in the world, they’re at the bottom of the list of those who need free food, but that’s not to say that if I were famous I would turn one down.
Mind you, I would hardly ever use one.
The news that Stormzy was given a virtual black card was broken by the big man himself, as he showed off the tool that will allow him to have free Greggs delivered to him any time, any place for free.
Posting the video to Twitter, the rapper wrote:
“Are you mad the first Greggs black card @GreggsOfficial
“I have peaked this is brilliant.”
The video showed a personal message to the UK hiphop artist, as it listed his achievements before saying that this was his greatest, and listing off locations he could get his hands on a pastry, including “Croydon“, “Glasto” or “Fraser T Smith’s studio“.
The message to the rapper signed off with:
“When you roll in, we’ll roll out.“
Stormzy was also gifted a pair of black slippers to match his sleek VIP card, following the rapper’s recent appearance on BBC Breakfast in January when he forgot to change out of his slippers before the interview.
‘Our Concierge card is strictly by invite only to some of our biggest fans. That’s all we can say.’
Speaking to the Guardian, the rapper, real name Michael Omari, added: ‘You know what, I love a vegan sausage roll, but – disclaimer! – do not mistake me for a vegan. Still love a Yum Yum though.
‘The sausage bean and cheese melt has been a favourite recently. Sausage steak bake; sausage, bean and cheese melt; or, in the festive season, you really want to get the turkey and cranberry one. That’s a good pastry.’
I guess I would use it for the Vegan Steak Bake they do. I tried it once and it is really nice, it’ll just never be able to live up to the glory of the standard Steak Bake. Nothing will.
Images via Getty, Twitter
Alfie Powell joined as an apprentice and was probably hired because he was likely the only person who applied. He's been blagging his way through writing articles for four years now and he's definitely showing signs of slowing down. When not writing for The Hook, Alfie finds time to indulge in his favourite hobbies, such as drinking and sitting down. You can contact Alfie at [email protected]Follow