It’s good fun. He won’t read this so I can get away with saying what I want and sure, maybe we do sometimes have too much of each other in one another’s lives, considering we’re in the same friends group who hang out after work and on the weekends. But that’s not to say I wouldn’t notice if he was gone.
I would, you could say, come to miss him (if my girlfriend’s reading this then yes I always miss you when you’re not around) and maybe his absence would leave a gap in my life that would need some filling.
I could talk to other friends, sure, I could spend time with my girlfriend (wuv u), sure, and I could enjoy my own company, but I think I’ll do what any sane person would do and get a cardboard cutout of him in my bedroom.
That’s an option now, apparently, as the catchily named Cardboard Cutout Standies are offering you the service of having whomever you want turned into a life-size cardboard cutout.
About bloody time.
All you need to do is upload the picture you want and then wait for it to be delivered to you. It couldn’t be easier, could it? You really only have to do one thing. One little diddly thing.
It works for other things too, as you can get a picture of you dog blown up until it’s taller than you. Why would you not want that in your house, gathering dust and taking up space? It’s every man’s dream.
I will offer one piece of advice; if you’re using a picture of your friend, make sure it isn’t one taken at head height – they end up looking stupidly top-heavy with massive heads and tiny feet. Just ridiculous.
Good luck out there.
Images via Instagram
Alfie Powell joined as an apprentice and was probably hired because he was likely the only person who applied. He's been blagging his way through writing articles for four years now and he's definitely showing signs of slowing down. When not writing for The Hook, Alfie finds time to indulge in his favourite hobbies, such as drinking and sitting down. You can contact Alfie at [email protected]Follow